Their energy, that is. Instead of being completely present, your friend (relative, workmate, boss, acquaintance, client…) is occupied by things other than you and your present time communication. Instead of being present, his energy is wandering off into endless texting, phone calls, or other distractions. Perhaps she isn’t really listening, or giving anything back. You may have the feeling that you are talking to yourself. This can be frustrating, especially when you came to discuss something important to you, or have contact with another human being.
You can get the feeling that perhaps, to this other person, your communication really isn’t very important, not their priority at the moment. It can feel like you aren’t really being seen or listened to, which is invalidating to experience.
Many of the people who are able to effortlessly earn your attention (and your loyalty) are the ones who know how to bring spirit to their communication. They give of themselves by being present. They know how to say hello to you, and to others too. Think of the teachers, friends, workmates, acquaintances, you’ve had in your life who were special to you, or still are. Their ability to be emotionally available, real, and honest, could have been what attracted you to them. They know how to be present, how to make each person feel special and heard. They know how to give of themselves.
Some people seem naturally gifted at this – call them charismatic. But if you have a hard time doing the same, finding yourself shy or holding back for some reason, it’s a great opportunity to ask yourself, what do these outgoing people know that you don’t?
Perhaps they can see you without judgment, see your spirit, your true energy. Maybe they don’t let shyness or insecurities get in their way when they meet strangers. Perhaps they are safe enough to be in unfamiliar situations. They might not be as sensitive to rejection or other people’s energies as you are.
If there are people who continually do not show up when you meet – they send their body but forget to come with it – you may want to ask yourself some questions, such as: why do you keep making plans to meet with someone who isn’t there?